


Fatal Flaw

by winter_angst



Category: Captain America (Movies)
Genre: Break Up, M/M, low calorie angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-05
Updated: 2021-03-05
Packaged: 2021-03-18 00:35:21
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,765
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29849907
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/winter_angst/pseuds/winter_angst
Summary: Brock’s always focused on the endgame and maybe that’s his fatal flaw.
Relationships: Jack Rollins/Brock Rumlow
Comments: 2
Kudos: 5





	Fatal Flaw

**Author's Note:**

> here's the break up fic that literally no one asked for. enjoy.

“So this is, then?” 

Brock twists his hands together but can’t bring himself to look up from the middle distance he’s fixed his eyes onto. He bobs his head, nice and easy. The apartment is so quiet now there was no fighting. It feels like the first peace they’ve experienced in weeks. It’s as haunting as it is welcome. Shadows of regret creep on Brock as Jack sighs heavily. He doesn’t have to look up to know that he’s rubbing his mouth with his fist the way he always does when he’s upset. And he is upset. They both are. It’s ugly and unwanted but it’s their reality and there’s very little he can do about it besides sit there and endure. To try and see a light of redemption at the end of the tunnel. But all he can see is the darkness of loneliness creeping up on him. He feels like he should be crying -- this was it after all -- but his body is too numb to allow emotions to mar it. So he sits, hands clasped together, and stares at nothing. 

“Are you going to say something?” Jack snaps. 

He always gets short when he gets upset. It’s a change from the quiet assured man Brock fell in love with. He wonders when things got so messed up and confused. When their love hit its peak and started a toward trend. They’re questions without answers. All he can do is accept what’s happened. Jack will have to as well. There’s no other way forward. It’s best they just walk away. Brock knows they're in the thick of things, showing each other ugliness that they didn’t want to show one another but now it’s all bare. They had to strip down to brass tacks to have the conversation, to be vulnerable and open and honest even if it hurts. And it does hurt, Brock can feel the echoes of it in his soul. A crushing terror of losing Jack, losing his best friend and his lover, is becoming a reality and all he can muster is a shrug. He hopes his passiveness isn’t read as a lack of care because he cares. He cares for Jack and he always will, but this separation is necessary for the sake of their happiness. There was no villain in the situation, no infidelity or abuse to chuck blame onto. Jack is a good man and so is Brock… At least, he was before the conversation began. 

He wonders if deep down he knew the conversation would reach this point. Would shatter the shards of a love left between them. Maybe he knew, subconsciously, that the only way for them to move forward was for them to do so apart. And that wasn’t discounting all the good had come from their relationship. Their time together will always be cherished and carried in Brock’s heart. And he will always feel the feeble flame of what was once a burning love. But it wasn’t bright enough to illuminate a journey with Jack any longer. 

So yes, this is it and there’s not left to say. 

“You’re seeing someone else, aren’t you?” 

Brock’s eyes drift shut as he considers lying. If he says yes perhaps Jack would demand he leave and this mess could be sorted out quickly, things divided up and each man on their journey to their next destination. If he does that they can leave behind all the hurt, all they had once had. Jack can stop fighting something too far in motion to even think of halting. Something that’s been in motion for a long time, Brock realizes. He wonders if heartache is the price of having ever dared to love. He wishes that Jack wasn’t in pain. He wishes he could take it all and place it upon himself because this was his fault, wasn’t it? He was the one to suggest having the talk, he’s the one who had suggested that a ‘break’ wasn’t going to fix anything. He’s the one who finally voiced that things weren’t fixable. 

He wishes he could be overthinking but he knows better. His mind is made up and while it’s an unfavorable ending it’s the one they’ll have to go with. Brock has given the relationship his all and there’s to show for it. What more does he have to give? Jack sighes heatedly and in Brock’s mind he sees him dragging his hand through his hair. Another tell of anger and desperation because he’s angry and desperate and Brock doesn’t blame him. There’s a drowning sense of desperation he feels as well. Part of him warring with his rationale that being unhappy is better than being alone. But Brock shuts it down. He won’t tolerate a half life for the both of them where there was a future, far from now, when things aren’t so fresh. 

Jack will meet someone new, someone wild and fun like Brock had been, witty but rational. They will discuss political ongoings without warring opinions. He will be a good cook, one who can do more than make eggs, pancakes, and TV dinners. They will spend hours in the kitchen together with all those little moments that they will cherish through their long, happy life together. Brock will meet someone new as well, someone steady and passionate like Jack was in the beginning. They will go to the gym together and catch up on reality TV together. He will be a sports fan and would prefer magazine articles over thick dusty books. They will spend long hours together talking about nothing and everything and conversation will never dry up. 

Both men are sure to experience incandescence with another who was out there, waiting. So why drag out the misery? Why prolong something that’s been a long time coming? Fear wasn’t a good excuse. Brock’s always focused on the endgame and maybe that’s his fatal flaw. The fact of the matter is that flame between is dying and it’s best to get out before the wick runs out. 

“No, Jack.” His voice sounds so alien, calm and cool. “I just think it’s time for us to go our separate ways. I think it’s been time for a while now.” 

“I don’t agree.” 

Brock cracks his eyes open and, with considerable efforts, turns his head towards Jack. He focuses on the scruff on his cheek and now his eyes. He knows he will dry in those pine green eyes and all his resolve will crumble away and Brock will be left rebuilding it just to repeat this very moment. “I want you to be happy, Jack.” 

“You make me happy.” 

“No, I don’t. And you don’t make me happy. Not anymore.” 

Jack’s breath catches and Brock’s eyes drift shut. He’s tried to be diplomatic, to keep things from getting hurtful or harsh because he doubts his ability to leave if Jack cries. “I don’t make you happy?” 

“You did,” Brock says, because it’s important he knows that it wasn’t a wasted effort all these years. Their relationship held a significance to Brock that no other has or ever will. “But things change.” 

“Nothing has changed for me.” Jack says, hurt. “I still love you.” 

“No you don’t. You hate change. You’re indifferent about me.” 

“Oh here we go. Tell me how I’m the bad guy here, Brock. Tell me who I’m tearing us apart while you’re the one sitting there acting like this is nothing!” 

“I don’t want to fight with Jack.” 

“I’m not asking you to fight with me. I’m asking you to fight for us.” Jack slipped off the couch and knelt in front Brock taking his hand. “We can do it baby. You and us verses the world right? We’ll put all this behind us. Go to therapy if we have to. I’m not ready to give up on us and I know you’re not either.” 

He’s so confident that it hurts Brock at how wrong he is. He pulls his hand and Jack lets him, hands falling lank as he sits back on his heels. Brock swallows drly. He doesn’t speak and neither does Jack. His action had said more than words ever could. 

“So this is it then.” Jack’s tone is deadened and it kills Brock to know he’s caused it. 

“It is.” 

Jack straightens up and stands there. The silence is somber but rejuvenating all at once. The two men both pondering a future free of bickering and verbal brawls. They both can finally see it for what it is, even though they’re still knee deep in it all. WIth their future would reinvention. They aren’t the same people parting as they were when they met and, should they meet again, they would be different men. This moment isn’t the definition of their time together. They were both empty shells of men who’ve given away all they had for the sake of maintaining something that wasn’t meant to be. A break up without anger left space for nothing but heartbreak and Brock knows it's coming, even if it hasn’t hit him yet. 

There will be days when he will regret today, days when he wants to be held by Jack. But he knows he will emerge, a renewed version of himself. A little bit older a whole lot wiser. Maybe they will bump into each other while they’re thriving into their new life. When they do they’ll be echoes of what they once shared, a melancholy moment of recollection. But that’s a long way into the future. The present is more pressing, more complicated. A lease to be terminated, friends and items to divide between them. But Brock feels like the hardest part of it all is over. 

He’s going forward as a single man, and it’s terrifying, but it’s necessary. He knows that Jack will feel the same way once the sting wears off. For now Brock will sleep on the couch and figure out the rest as it comes. It feels wrong to have the weight of it taken off him, easing his mind despite all the complications that came with it. But matters of the heart are never simple. 

Regardless they would both find individual happiness and that’s what’s important. One day Brock will look in the mirror and reflect on this moment as a positive step in his life. For now he was starting to feel the ghosts of pain in chest as the impact of what’s come to fruition hits him. But it’s sorrow, not regret. He knows he made the right choice.


End file.
